John and Ruth Braaksma, 1943
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As the years have ticked away, much I write about my family is in memorial, having lost both my parents, my sister, a brother, and now on January 31, 2014, my nephew, Ronnie Braaksma senior. Not unlike many families, we were not spared love or heartache.
There were five of us and at times six: Mom, Dad, John Jr., Patricia, David, and my half-sister from Mom's first marriage, Jeanette Herrling. Jeanette was adopted by Dolly and Florence Bradford of Madison, Wis., and was in our lives for visits only — and those separations and reunions through the years were monumental.
I'm writing in the present and so much of my family life is in the past, memories pictured in photo albums and tucked away in my mind. When I think of my parents, I recall the greatest gifts they gave me, love and approval. Since those are the elements that shaped my life and reside in my heart, I thought I would begin there.
My parents didn't own property or stock until later years, but growing up with their love and approval was priceless. It's really quite remarkable to be surrounded with love and acceptance.
Today, turn on the television for a nano second and you're hit in the face with the continual juxtaposition of one person against another in petty rivalry, second guessing, and finger pointing. We had none of that in our home or family tree. The air was clear.
I think that is the greatest legacy of my Braaksma heritage. Everyone was important to grandpa and grandma. I've heard family members try to lay claim to being the black sheep in the Braaksma family tree, but it usually falls on dim ears because there are no black sheep in our family. All anyone seems to care about is, "How are you doing?" The well being of the individual trumps deeds done.
That theory hit home during a mother-daughter talk when I was in my 30s. Mom, thinking that I was thinking, I was special since I was such a good girl and a good daughter and therefore had earned some brownie points with her that in fact I had not.
To quote mom, "I know you think I should love you more than your brothers and sisters because you're so good ... but, I don't." For some reason, Mom thought she needed to apologize to me because she did more for Butch, who had gone rogue, so to speak, than for me.
I was dumbfounded that she felt I was owed an apology for her unconditional love for her son. Fortunately, I learned the family secret years earlier, love trumps all. There are no "good" and "bad" columns within families.
As family goes, the sum of the parts is always greater than the whole, and that pretty much explains my family. I've included a few photos from our family album, simply to mark the years of the John and Ruth Braaksma family and to honor the family they loved.
John and his brother Wally (Wallace) Braaksma served, evidently, at the same time period and possibly the same campaign(s). John and Wally met up in Tittmoning, Germany, in 1945 (pictured). His brother, Ray also served during WWII as I recall.
The Braaksma's have a long line of military service. Dad, his brothers Harold, Pete (US. Air Force), Ray and Wally served in the Army, followed by several children and grandchildren.
Along came the children ...
The Braaksma's have a long line of military service. Dad, his brothers Harold, Pete (US. Air Force), Ray and Wally served in the Army, followed by several children and grandchildren.
Along came the children ...
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